


Regret.

by Saige



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: Angst, F/M, Love, Shenko - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-23
Updated: 2013-11-23
Packaged: 2018-01-02 10:46:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 566
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1055868
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Saige/pseuds/Saige
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Shepard is near-death and has a mild hallucination about her regrets of letting her friends die. I left it open so you can imagine it's your own femshep perhaps and Kaidan, but the thought process is heavily based on my own femshep.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Regret.

She was sinking slowly, she could feel it. Her eyes were closed, refusing to open no matter how hard she tried. She must have fallen in a lake or perhaps a pool, she could feel water moistening her skin to the point where it started to wrinkle. She couldn’t breath, her body twisting at the sharp pains in her chest. Her lungs were crying out for air, but her mouth refused to open.It was then that she heard a harsh whisper in her ear. “Shepard.” The voice murmured. It sounded so familiar, like she had heard it only yesterday.

"Shepard." A different voice said this time, it was high-pitched and spoke quickly unlike the first voice. She tried to think, ignoring the burning sensations in her chest and throat. She knew those voices, but she didn’t know from where..

"You did it, Shepard." What seemed to sound like a million voices said at once, "I knew you could do it." It was then that she realized where she knew the voices from. They were the voices of the people that she had failed on this impossible mission. They were the voices of friends she had let down and left for dead, they were the voices of her own regret.

“Don’t be so hard on yourself, Skipper.” The first voice she recognized as Ashley’s said in a comforting tone, like a mother consoling their frightened child.

“Nothing you could do.” The second voice she knew as Mordin’s said in an equally soft voice. “Don’t blame you.”

"There is so much good in the world, so much beauty." Thane’s voice said softly, she knew that he was smiling even though all she could see was black. "And yet you hate almost everything you see." She knew that he was right. Ever since Ash’s death she had begun hating herself and the world she was trying to save, it had only gotten worse after the suicide mission. She had hidden it well from others, but he had picked up on it almost instantly.

“Let go.” Ash pleaded with her. She could feel someone stroking her hair and loud noises. Why were there loud noises? She wondered, it had been silent only moments ago. “Forgive yourself and live.”The noises were getting louder, almost drowning out the voices. She was vaguely aware that she wasn’t sinking anymore and that she was lying on what felt like rubble.

“It is time to wake up, Shepard-Commander.” She heard Legion’s robotic voice faintly say, she could hear another, much louder, voice calling for someone. “Wake up.”

She opened her eyes and gasped for air, smoke and ash filling her lungs. Her vision was blurred, but she could make out someone crouched down beside her, their face looking down at her own.

"You’re alive, thank God." The gruff voice said, her vision focused more and she could vaguely make out a pair of whiskey brown eyes staring at her in relief.

"Kaidan." She whispered softly, reaching out her hand to stroke his face. She could barely lift her hand, and it took all her willpower to ignore the pain and place her hand on his cheek. He put his own hand on hers gently and she felt his tears drop down onto her face.

“Don’t leave me behind.” He whispered hoarsely as she slipped into unconsciousness once more. “Don’t leave me behind again.”


End file.
